Monday, April 13, 2015

A to Z Challenge Housekeeping

A lot of people taking part in the A to Z Challenge (mostly from blogger or blogspot blogs) have been redirected here, to Kyoto Kendo Connect. I suspect this is because clicking my Google+ avatar is easier than copy and pasting the web address I've left in comments.

For clarity, Kyoto Kendo Connect is not participating in the April A to Z Challenge. Blogger and Blogspot blogs refuse to let me post with my Wordpress ID. Something goes wrong in the multiple captchas and the post goes into a preview/publish loop from which there is no escape. To solve this problem I post via my Google+ account, which automatically links to this blog. I tried adding a link to my blogs participating in A to Z, but since most of the Blogger and Blogspot blogs I commented on don't seem to support html in comments, I started simply leaving a web address.

If you find yourself brought here by mistake, do not fear! I have two other blogs participating in A to Z and you can find them here:

Diary of an Aspiring Writer

Out of Print

Happy writing! :)

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Kendo can be one of those frustrating endeavors that even if you are doing everything correctly, there are still hundreds of things that are going wrong. Combine that with learning it in its native language, a language that I am still myself learning, and the frustration is tenfold.

On Friday I went to practice feeling good, and Nakano sensei and Koyama sensei both helped me with my suburi, as they promised, Nakano sensei in particular was trying to get me to understand that I don't have to use a lot of power from my shoulders to get the shinai swinging. It was, of course, a difficult concept to grasp at first. I'm still not sure I have it down, but what I understand is, if the swing is started from the wrists, not a lot of power needs to be struck downward. The weight of the shinai on its own can provide the power. The snap at the end is made by snapping the the wrists at the last second before the strike. Of course, there's much more to the technique of actually landing a strike than this, but I'm going back to the basics, ask Okusa sensei says, and this is a new way of looking at things. Nakano sensei also suggests pushing the elbows forward, instead of dropping them , or at least keeping that image in mind when striking. They will make the whole strike one, smooth motion, instead of breaking it into two, which is a habit I have picked up.

Today doing mawari-geiko my back started hurting again. So I took Fukao's sensei's advice and, when I could no longer do an entire keiko, I bowed out. I tried to leave the dojo, so as not to take up room, but there were too many people and I was trapped, so eventually I went back to my partner, and crouched on the ground. I'm not sure what Fukao sensei saw, but he got on my case again about quitting in a keiko. It was one of those times when I really wished I could understand what he is trying to tell me completely, and am able to explain myself again. This is why:

Two weeks ago he told me that if I cannot complete a whole keiko, it is OK to sit out, but don't start a fight and then bow out in the middle. I took this advice to heart and, after completing a whole match with Koyama sensei on Friday, I judged that the pain in my back was too great to complete another one, so, I bowed out. Perhaps Fukao sensei thought that I quit in the middle of my match again. Something has been lost in translation here and I'm neither able to understand what it is, nor clarify my own actions. So, I can only nod my head and try again next time. Hopefully my back will allow me to comeplete however many rounds of mawari-geiko Itou sensei has us do tomorrow. I don't want to risk Fukao sensei's lecture again.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

On Monday I was still feeling the effects from the weekend's flash cold, although I'm feeling much better, surprisingly quickly (I'm chalking this up to the lifestyle changes that have made me, overall, feel much more genki. Knowing, however, that my lungs are sensitive to bronchitis, and feeling the dizziness that comes from clogged sinuses and imbalanced ear fluid, I went to practice to watch, yesterday. It was a good experience. Since Koyama sensei and Nakanao sensei offered to show me some proper suburi techniques, it would have been a waste not to go to practice when I can still swing a shinai.

Itou sensei also gave me some good hints. It boiled down to a few things: Nakanao sensei suggested that I'm unfolding my arms too slowly, joint by joint. and that I should let the shinai swing down by it's own weight, only adding a final snap by the wrists at the end. This will produce a good patt sound as well as increase the speed of my swing.

 He also helped my with my kamae. He said that the center is key, and that even if the kensen is slightly off center, we can remain in the center if the left fist is remains steady they. Push forward with the left first in the center, and the strike will also be in the center. This left first forward motion will prevent the Right hand from pressing too far left to get center which will open the kote op for a strike. Protect the right wrist with a slightly off center tilt of the kensen, but remain in control of the center line with the strength of the left fist.

Koyama sensei also reminded me that movement should start with the right knee. It should carry forward. The left foot should push against the ground to propel you forward while the right knee should lead. This has always been a difficulty for me though.

These are the basics that I must practice to pass san-dan. With extra instruction at the beginning of keiko, I hope I'll be able to memorize them in time for the July exam.

Saturday, February 28, 2015

Yesterday I had one of the most positive affirmations so far in my kendo advancement: my teachers told me I did not need to practice kata anymore [for the san-dan test]. Aside from a few points to engrave into muscle memory for nana-hon-me, they said my kata is fine the way it is, and doesn't need any further tinkering at this stage. YAY!

Everything else, however, it is as Okusa-Sensei always says: back to basics. The basics of the swing, "throwing" the shinai in an arch; the basics of foot work, not to leave the left foot behind; the basics of straight posture; the basics of kamae and a stationary, centered left fist and kensen.

It was these points I worked on yesterday. Koyama sensei helped me visualize the correct posstion of the arms as cupping water in the hands... and then turning the wrists in. I'll try to visualize this, but in my do my arms feel cramped.

My back felt good today, as did my foot. I took a short break in between mari-geiko and juu-geiko before getting into it again with Fukao sensei and Ino sensei. Fukao sensei seems to believe my problem is confidence. He'll let me take hits instead of me figuring out how to do it on my own. Granted, when given the chance to figure it out on my own I often take too long to do so.

We had an interesting moment together before practice, where he was reminding me the reason why we fight for the center line with the kensen of the shinai. It is, naturally, to have the advantage for a centered hit on the opponent's men. We were not wearing men while he was explaining this, while he was demonstrating this. Fukao sensei has a very intense face when doing kendo; it's one of the reasons that I like to keiko with him so much, so when we were practicing this jostling shinai, I was receiving intense signals of aggression from him, in his face in his posture and in the pressure of his shinai. Seven and a half years of kendo has not left me bereft of instincts. More than a few times I was almost provoked into hitting him. He saw it too, and responded to my jerks forward, my feigns and hastily stopped advances with his own calculated retreats and increased seme.

It was fun, I admit, these are the moments in kendo that I adore the most, but it was also dangerous, and I asked if we could stop. In Canada once at a UBC practice we were doing men strike drills without our men on. I missed the raised shinai and jabbed my opponent in the eye with the kensen. It was a horrible feeling of regret, and one of the only times I have ever asked a teacher if we could quit a drill.

Unfortunately, I couldn't sustain that sort of seme during actual keiko today. Despite starting practice with energy and gusto, my strength waned by the end. Fortunately (if one is looking for the silver lining in a negative situation) it turns out that this sudden weakness wasn't due to an inability on my part, but rather the onset of a bad cold which I probably made worse with the 40 minute bike ride home in the snow.

Needless to say, I probably won't be going to Ren Shin Kai practice tomorrow morning, but I may still go to practice on Monday. Koyama sensei offered to teach me some techniques for basic striking before practice begins that would be worthwhile to do, even if keiko itself may be too difficult.

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Nana-hon-me is going to be one of those kata that keeps causing my problems. Part of the reason for this is that as soon as I figure I've got one set of motions down corrctly, one piece of the timing, or angle of the swing, someone points out another thing that I'm doing wrong. I know on an intellectual level that this is part of the process of learning, that mistakes are addressed by order of priority to slowly become better at the thing that is being studied, However, nana-hon-me is a complicated kata, both for its footwork, the timing of the strikes, the harmony with the opponent and the somewhat difficult motions of the body as a whole. When I'm corrected on a new thing, my focus naturally goes into correcting that portion of the kata. Unfortunately, this draws focus away from the previously memorized portions, which allows for mistakes, or worse yet, the formation of bad habits. This naturally prompts further corrections which can start to clog and confuse the mind. Language barriers don't help this. Fortunately kata can be demonstrated more easily than regular kendo, I feel, and with the good and patient teachers that I have, I feel myself improving, step by step.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Today was an interesting experiment in how much my body can take when my mind is switched off. This must be the 'no mindedness' that is so pervasive in kendo philosophy. Now, if only I could get there without putting my body in a calorie panic, life would be peachy.

Unfortunately, dieting has its drawbacks too. Aside from the pounding headache I've had all day, I've been forgetting things--little things-- that are usually routine for me. Like how many steps back to take in kata. I was counting the damn steps, but I just didn't stop at five. My head was somewhere else. Fortunately, after that I was able to pull my head back in and do a fairly successful kata sequence, nan-hon-me aside. Fukao sensei is trying to get my to finish the do strike at a 90 degree angle before turning to look at my opponent, but my muscles are having a hard time remembering the intricate details for the whole things, so its slow going.

Suburi was the hardest part of practice though. Trying to reintegrate the idea of throwing the shinai was a bit more difficult than I expected it to be, mostly because when you fix one thing your break three others. Itou sensei had to talk to me about my kiai. Oops.

Kihon was better today than it has been in a while. I was able to get through all the drills with speed and flexibility, mostly, I think, because my brain was completely shut off, and I could just do the thing I needed to do without thinking about it. It was nice, I admit.

I did a few mawari-geiko, too, keeping in mind Fukao sensei's advice of "Don't start something you can't finish." Since my body and mind were working on different worlds, maybe that's why today was a little easier, In any case, my right leg was one massive cramp today, from all the stress I've been putting it through. Hopefully a day of rest tomorrow will sort it out.

I had a mock shiai with Yuko today. It didn't feel as good as the mawari-geiko, but it was all right. I also had a bit of success fighting Sato sensei today.We always finished too close to each other, so I switched my tachi-ai, and was able to get him a few good times on men. That felt good. Even he said it was a good thing to realize and implement.

All in all, it was a good practice, even if it went 25 minutes over the usual time. I got home super late. No time to make a healthy dinner with all the super markets closed. Combini it is.

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Self-Reflection

I've been having a bit of trouble focusing myself and orienting myself toward my goals. I think part of this is because I've lost sight of what my goals are. This is never a good thing. It can lead a person into a downward spiral emotionally, physically, mentally. I've tried to redefine and understand who I am and who I want to be so many times that I think I've lost who the core of me actually is.

Kendo is a lifestyle. I seem to have forgotten this in the need to consider other lifestyles that I am currently engaged in. Some of these lifestyles are necessary, healthy progressions of me as an individual. Others, not so much. In this losing of self, I've lost sight of a lot of the things that gave me true satisfaction in exchange for what gives only temporary pleasure. In trying to find a harmony between lifestyles to re-balance myself, I've left kendo at the wayside.

I thought for a while that I had lost my passion for kendo, as if it were something that could that easily disappear. In reflecting on this I see that this isn't the case. I have the same passion for kendo that I've always had, but I have erected barriers between myself and this passion so the way is now conflicted and uncertain. Before I can love kendo again, I must remove these barriers. Before I love kendo, I must love myself.

Sometimes it takes hard words to understand. Sometimes it takes pain and failure and misery to truly see. I hope I can lift myself above the challenges I face now and return to a place where I am truly happy. If I can keep putting one foot in front of the other, taking steps toward becoming the person I want to be, then I can embrace kendo into my life again, and more importantly, kendo can embrace me.